I hear some say that Facebook is a waste of time. They go on about how they don’t bother and don’t want anything to do with it. It’s just a bunch of fake news. I will say that the politics of our nation has brought forth some crap that I could just as well do without, but I cannot disagree more with the premise that Facebook is a waste of time. If not for Facebook I wouldn’t be able to keep up on the activities of my nieces, nephews, cousins, grandchildren, or long distance friends and family. In a world that competes for our time, it is a joy to stay on top of what is going on with those who have played a role in my life.
Along with old high school classmates, long lost coworkers, or old neighbors from neighborhoods that I have long ago left, I occasionally hear from old friends from a childhood I don’t dwell on. Recently I had another reach out on Facebook that has taken me back down memory lane.
As I have shared in my past blogs, my childhood is not anything I ever want to recall or live over. Yet, with my adult life being what it is, I can’t help but ponder now and again where the idea of choice came from. So the recent reach out from a childhood relationship took me down memory lane and reminded me that just because bad things happened to me, it never meant that there were not moments of happiness too. After years of reflection, I believe it was this kind of moments that allowed me to see there were other ways of living, showing me that there was the choice of how to live that life. In a child fraught with chaos and hurt, it as a seed that was planted that would show me one day how to do it different…living that is!
Specifically, there were two times in my childhood that provided me with the kind of insight that has carried me into my adult life. One came from the period where my parents made friends with two families, the Reinharts and the Donats, that showed us some happy times surrounded by families who gave love freely. It was a short period as most of my parent's friendships didn’t last too long, but still provided us a couple of summers that were full of fun and carefree days of joyful gatherings and childhood friendships. For me, the Donat family has always carried a special place in my heart. First, their son, gave me my first ever kiss. A girl just never forgets that! But the family was full of life, love, and generosity. I still can see Mrs. Donat making her homemade spaghetti sauce. It was an all day process. Tasting, testing, adding a pinch of this and a pinch of that. I was fascinated by the process and recognized even at that age how much love and pride went into her sauce. And the sauce? I will tell you I have spent a lifetime searching for the flavor I remember from that time. I remember the family being close, connected, and generous with each other. When their friendship parted from my parents, it was a sad time for me. I missed the fun that we experienced when they were around.
The other time was when I met Paul Leuthe’s family from Milwaukee. They were a loving Catholic family and although Paul and I “liked” each other, it was his family and the love they displayed for each other that drew me in. They are the reason I became Catholic. I can still remember a weekend visit, surrounded by a table full of kids, waiting until midnight so they could order a pizza with sausage…a meatless Friday ritual. They would invite me to attend church with them on Sunday and I found myself filled with the emotion of the service. Once I graduated from high school and had a job working for the Navy, I would pass by St. Gilbert’s in Grayslake, Illinois, on my way home. I started attending Sunday Mass and then one day while driving home I pulled in, knocked on the rectory door, and announced to Father Laske that I wanted to convert.
“Getting married?” he asked.
“No,” I responded. “I just want to become Catholic.”
Both of these families showed me by their living, that there could be joy in sitting around a table, having discussions, playing games, and sharing. Both of these families provided a peek into the kind of life I wanted to create for myself when I became an adult. I got lucky. I met a man who provided just that for me, so when I left Illinois at age 19, I never looked back.
Facebook has provided me an opportunity to say thank you (at least to one of these families), for showing me the possibility of living a loving life!
Thank you!
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