Tomorrow is 9/11. That date will forever be etched in the lives of those who lived through that day. I have kept a journal about this period. Took pictures, kept samples of all the things that came across that had a patriotic symbol on it…all in remembrance of what we experienced that 9/11. Now, on the anniversary I write in my journal once again, updating what we have been doing, never imagining that I would be writing an update so far in the future chronicling the aftermath of that day. But here we are, still fighting and losing our young men and women in a war that looks like it’s impossible to win.
I know I was forever changed by that moment. There is nothing I can say here to change our lives as they are today, but one thing has not changed and that is the love I carry in my heart for those in my life. What I wrote to my children that first Thanksgiving after 9/11 is as relevant today as it was then, so I shall share it here with you.
Thanksgiving 2001
To Our Dearest Children,
Due to the events of September 11th, Thanksgiving has taken on a new meaning for many of us. After the first few days of shock and grief, I looked around and saw that we all were intact and I said, “Thank you, God.”
The events of September 11th have touched my soul. Although Joliene was closest to ground zero, I needed to hear all of your voices. I needed to know you were all okay. That was the most frightening morning that my life had ever experienced. I will never be the same. Thoughts are deeper. Touches have more sensation. The eyes see more intensely. Through all of this, by how you live, you have reminded me that this too shall pass and life goes on; the wedding plans, the expecting of a newborn baby, the goals that are being set, the hope for something or someone of tomorrow.
Thanksgiving is a time to reflect on the good things that have happened to us. YOU are the good things that have happened to us. I love you in ways that words alone are too inadequate to express. it is a joy to be your parent. My life is a rich mosaic of personalities, experiences, and emotions just because of you.
I hope you too take a moment during this Thanksgiving holiday to reflect on your surroundings. your life, and especially your goals. I have a friend who lives by a three-word philosophy: “Seize the moment.” Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they haven’t thought about it, don’t have it on their schedule, didn’t know it was coming or are too rigid to depart from their routine. If September 11th taught us anything, it taught us to seize the moment.
I read somewhere that “we Americans cram so much into our lives, that we tend to schedule our headaches. We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves when all the conditions are perfect: We’ll go back and visit the grandparents when we get Stevie toilet-trained. We’ll entertain when we replace the living-room carpet. We’ll go on a second honeymoon when we get two more kids out of college.”
Life has a way of accelerating as we get older. The days get shorter, and the list of promises to ourselves gets longer. One morning, we awaken, and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of “I’m going to…” I plan on…” and “Someday, when things are settled down a bit…” Dad said this year as he faced his latest physical challenge, “I thought I would work, retire and end my days fishing off into the sunset.” Well, we will work, he will retire, but we will be searching for other things to do in that sunset and all I keep thinking of are the times when we put those fishing trips off waiting for the day in the future when all things would be perfect to follow our dream.
When anyone calls my seize-the-moment-friend, she is open to adventure and available for trips. She keeps an open mind on new ideas. Her enthusiasm for life is contagious. September 11th says to me now go live and be more like my friend. Life is a balance between our wants and needs. it is important to keep your responsibilities in tact, but do not forget that it is also important to do something on your “WANT TO…not just something on your SHOULD DO list.
A woman in my memoir group wrote the following and with her permission I share it with you:
Have you ever watched kids playing on a merry-go-round? Or listened to the rain lapping on the ground? Ever followed a butterfly’s erratic flight? Or gazed at the sun into the fading night? Slow down. Don’t dance so fast. Time is short. The music won’t last.
Do you run through each day on the fly? When you ask, “How are you?”, do you hear the reply? When the day is done, do you lie in your bed with the next hundred chores running through your head? Ever told your child, “We’ll do it tomorrow. And in your haste, not see his sorrow? Ever lost touch? Let a good friendship die? Just call to say “Hi? You’d better slow down…do not dance so fast. Time is short. The music won’t last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere, you miss half the fun of getting there. When you worry and hurry through your day, it is like an unopened gift…thrown away. Life is not a race. Take it slower. Hear the music before the song is over.
Your Dad and I wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving.
With All Our Love…
Much has changed since that 9/11, except for this one thing…my love for my family remains as deep and hard as it was that first Thanksgiving after 9/11.
How has 9/11 changed you?
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